The Stranglers Love

Our romantic relationships profoundly shape our emotional well-being and overall lives. My own journey began at 21 when I married with hope, only for that hope to shatter after my husband’s life-altering car accident. The man I loved transformed, grappling with anger and confusion due to brain damage. For 17 years, I endured a toxic marriage, held back by societal expectations and my beliefs about divorce. It took two decades of emotional turmoil for me to find the strength to leave, a decision that brought its own set of challenges as I worked to heal.

In this book, I share the lessons I’ve learned about toxic relationships, drawing on my experiences and the insights gained from my work in counselling over the past 24 years. Using the Strangler Fig Tree as a metaphor, I explore how such relationships can entangle us, often disguised as love while stifling our potential.

As social beings, we crave connections, but not all relationships uplift us. Recognising toxic behaviours is essential to reclaiming our lives and nurturing healthier connections. My hope is that the stories and reflections within these pages will inspire you to assess your relationships and empower you to seek those that promote your well-being. Let’s embark on this journey together toward healthier, fulfilling romantic relationships.